To unlearn a lifetime...

Sometimes I despise this body... its frailties...
its imperfections...
its weaknesses.

Somestimes I despise this mind... my wandering thoughts... its lack of organization...
the fixation on the inane... and the overlooking of the One thing that matters.

Sometimes I despise this heart... this heart that tears in half so easily.  This heart that yearns so deeply... that longs to please.

I. Am. Flawed.

I am broken.  This world is broken.  Human love is broken.
And it's hard.

It's hard not to push away when it hurts.  Not to build a wall around my heart.  A fence of offense. 
It's hard not to sink into the desire to be self-sufficient.  It's hard not to hear the line... "You don't need anyone.  You don't need Anyone."

It's hard to close my ears to the lie.

In case you missed that...

It's a lie.

The Truth is I Am.

I am complete. Created in His image. Not alone. 

The truth is that I am covered by a Jesus who falls on His face before the Father on my behalf so that God can look at me with love and adoration.

How can I not honor that?

So I am learning. 

I am learning to love this body. 
     This body that He carefully crafted together. 

I am learning to renew this mind.
     This mind that He formed with the intent of knowing His thoughts.

I am learning to open this heart.
    This broken heart that has a purpose for His kingdom.

I am learning to depend on Him... to lean into the people He has placed in my life for the best purposes... to grow deep roots.


I am learning that the only way to live in victory is to die to everything I thought I knew.

I have so much to unlearn.




 



Comments

  1. gquadAugust 24, 2012 at 8:59 PM

    ~love~ keep blogging Kayla, love you <3

    ReplyDelete
  2. UnknownAugust 24, 2012 at 11:20 PM

    Wonderful reminder! Thanks for sharing your heart :) love u :)

    ReplyDelete

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