I know that You are for me
A friend who delights my heart spoke to me last week about how God was stretching her...
stretching her...
in ways she could never have anticipated.
And those words struck hard.
A sensation I could remember feeling... a work I knew the Lord had done in my life. But He is faithful to only give us what we're ready for.
And I wasn't ready to know.
I wasn't ready to know how BIG He is. Or how wide. Or how deep. Or how vast. Or how holy. Or how perfect. Or how beautiful. Or how terrifying. Or how just. Or how true. Or how merciful.
Or how small i was in comparison.
Sometimes He has to make us bigger so that He can fill us up.
I only have the capacity to hold as much of Him as He allows.
Sometimes He has to make more room.
Because He knows me.
He knows I live a life less thankful. My small mind is focused on my small problems. I lose sight of HOW BIG HE IS. I lose sight of how good and true and constant He is.
Sometimes He has to take me back to the very beginning so I can see how very grateful I really am.
And there are so very many beginnings.
God, thank You for a Mama who you chose to keep me. Thank You for putting me in a family that cares. Thank You for letting them see who You are at just the right time. That's amazing. The timing You have brings me to my knees. Thank You for a mom who introduced us to church and a church family that taught us about love and unity. Thank You for a mama who always wants to do things the right way. And I'm thankful beyond words that she loves me.
God, thank You for Daddy. I love him so much. I'm so thankful that he calls me his Princess. I'm thankful for every fight we've had and every tear we've cried and for the Daddy who loved me through it all. Thank You for a dad who worked so hard to provide for us. Thank You for giving us a life in Indiana. Leaving Texas was so hard... but this is home. Thank You for a daddy who fixes my car and doesn't mind my snot when I'm crying on his shoulder. Thank You for a dad who loves me.
God, thank You so much for Thomas Estabrook. Thank you for creating this man who suits me better than I could have imagined. Thank You for this person who knows that I am not perfect and chose to spend his life with me anyway. Thank You for the laughter he brings me, and for the way that he leads me closer to You, and for the difference he makes in my life. I am a better person for knowing him. God, thank You for sending me into his life. I owe You one! (But I guess You're not really counting.)
God, thank You beyond words for Becky Boyles. Thank You for knowing what I needed before I even knew I could ask for it. Thank You for this person who loves me right where I am but challenges me not to stay there. Thank You for a friend who is abandoned to worshipping You with her whole life... who buries herself in Your truth and shines Your light in the darkness. Thank You for what You allow me to learn through her.
God, thank You so much for a Pastor who is hungry for the knowledge of who You are. Thank You for the abilities You gave Seth Alexander to lead First Baptist Church. Thank You for equipping him more than he even realizes. Thank You for giving him a heart for the lost. God, I pray that You would stretch Your hand over him and cover him... that You would hem him in before and behind... and that You would produce miracles through his faith.
God, thank You for a Pastor's Wife who is living in the trenches on her knees with Jesus. Thank You for Lauren Alexander. Thank You for the strengths that You gave her, God, and the way that she uses them for Your glory. I ask that You would multiply the blessings in her home. Lord, give her more than enough.
Thank You for every time You let me put my foot into a hole. God, thank You for every time You allowed me make my own way down a dark, dreary path. Thank You for giving me the freedom to walk in the chains I picked out for myself.
And when I made it to the very end of me... Thank You for the real freedom that comes from walking in the path You set out. It's hard. Sometimes I'm not good at it. I'm not graceful. I'm impatient. I'm rough around the edges. I am sarcastic and sometimes no one gets me and when I get the hiccups I'm really loud.
But You knew that before I was born. And You stretch me to fit You.
And You have always known exactly what I needed.
stretching her...
in ways she could never have anticipated.
And those words struck hard.
A sensation I could remember feeling... a work I knew the Lord had done in my life. But He is faithful to only give us what we're ready for.
And I wasn't ready to know.
I wasn't ready to know how BIG He is. Or how wide. Or how deep. Or how vast. Or how holy. Or how perfect. Or how beautiful. Or how terrifying. Or how just. Or how true. Or how merciful.
Or how small i was in comparison.
Sometimes He has to make us bigger so that He can fill us up.
I only have the capacity to hold as much of Him as He allows.
Sometimes He has to make more room.
Because He knows me.
He knows I live a life less thankful. My small mind is focused on my small problems. I lose sight of HOW BIG HE IS. I lose sight of how good and true and constant He is.
Sometimes He has to take me back to the very beginning so I can see how very grateful I really am.
And there are so very many beginnings.
God, thank You for a Mama who you chose to keep me. Thank You for putting me in a family that cares. Thank You for letting them see who You are at just the right time. That's amazing. The timing You have brings me to my knees. Thank You for a mom who introduced us to church and a church family that taught us about love and unity. Thank You for a mama who always wants to do things the right way. And I'm thankful beyond words that she loves me.
God, thank You for Daddy. I love him so much. I'm so thankful that he calls me his Princess. I'm thankful for every fight we've had and every tear we've cried and for the Daddy who loved me through it all. Thank You for a dad who worked so hard to provide for us. Thank You for giving us a life in Indiana. Leaving Texas was so hard... but this is home. Thank You for a daddy who fixes my car and doesn't mind my snot when I'm crying on his shoulder. Thank You for a dad who loves me.
God, thank You so much for Thomas Estabrook. Thank you for creating this man who suits me better than I could have imagined. Thank You for this person who knows that I am not perfect and chose to spend his life with me anyway. Thank You for the laughter he brings me, and for the way that he leads me closer to You, and for the difference he makes in my life. I am a better person for knowing him. God, thank You for sending me into his life. I owe You one! (But I guess You're not really counting.)
God, thank You beyond words for Becky Boyles. Thank You for knowing what I needed before I even knew I could ask for it. Thank You for this person who loves me right where I am but challenges me not to stay there. Thank You for a friend who is abandoned to worshipping You with her whole life... who buries herself in Your truth and shines Your light in the darkness. Thank You for what You allow me to learn through her.
God, thank You so much for a Pastor who is hungry for the knowledge of who You are. Thank You for the abilities You gave Seth Alexander to lead First Baptist Church. Thank You for equipping him more than he even realizes. Thank You for giving him a heart for the lost. God, I pray that You would stretch Your hand over him and cover him... that You would hem him in before and behind... and that You would produce miracles through his faith.
God, thank You for a Pastor's Wife who is living in the trenches on her knees with Jesus. Thank You for Lauren Alexander. Thank You for the strengths that You gave her, God, and the way that she uses them for Your glory. I ask that You would multiply the blessings in her home. Lord, give her more than enough.
Thank You for every time You let me put my foot into a hole. God, thank You for every time You allowed me make my own way down a dark, dreary path. Thank You for giving me the freedom to walk in the chains I picked out for myself.
And when I made it to the very end of me... Thank You for the real freedom that comes from walking in the path You set out. It's hard. Sometimes I'm not good at it. I'm not graceful. I'm impatient. I'm rough around the edges. I am sarcastic and sometimes no one gets me and when I get the hiccups I'm really loud.
But You knew that before I was born. And You stretch me to fit You.
And You have always known exactly what I needed.
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